Tuesday, April 4, 2017
Garment District
Yaz visited us in New York for a few days and we were so happy!!! She looks us through the Garment District where she used to buy textiles for her job. Maeve selected some fabric for a dress Yaz is going to make for her and we enjoyed looking at all of the millions of different kinds of fabrics!
Monday, April 3, 2017
Bronx Zoo
We made the long trek to the Bronx Zoo after seeing it on Animal Planet and in the movie Madagascar. It was a cold and rainy day and many of the exhibits were closed. The gorillas and giraffes were off exhibit as well. We enjoyed tons of birds and the Madagascar building. It certainly wasn't the perfect zoo day, so I guess we will just have to go back!!We did get to experience a Rio Movie in 4d and enjoy the bug carousel, complete with a dung beetle chair.
Wednesday, March 22, 2017
The view
Our apartment in NY is really great!!! The master bedroom and living area have huge windows with clear views of The Empire State Building. It's quite noisy with all of the taxis and traffic, but it's pretty close to Paul's office.
Our address here is:
777 6th Ave, Apt. 18C
New York, NY 10001
NYC
It's hard to know how to write about this transition because my emotions change every twenty minutes. Last fall, Paul was approached about a position in the NY office of Amazon. We prayed and prayed about the right thing to do for a long time. We loved Seattle.... everything about it reflected our "style" and our way of living. We had an amazing, visionary church, a completely walkable life, good friends, and the greatest outdoor opportunities imaginable.
All of the times we missed our friends and family in PA over the last few years, we would always come back to the fact that Paul wasn't ready to leave Amazon. So, when this option presented itself, it was a bridge between the sadness of missing our "people" and the opportunity to keep a great job.
Dozens of journal entries log my emotional highs and lows of trying to listen for God's voice in the middle of the questions.
Because the kids struggled so much moving West, our first duty was to let them decide. Maeve quickly agreed to move and delighted about seeing her family much more often. She started counting the days she could spend with her grandparents and delighted in more celebrations at "home." Noah immediately said "no." and so we left it at that.
As weeks went by, we didn't bring up the topic, but one day, while sitting in the back seat, Noah said flatly, "I'm ready to move back." Of course, we talked it all through and he agreed that he was on board. He was excited about the idea of having a yard and a house with more space and seeing all of the people he has been missing so much.
God's voice has been more clear to me in the past few months than almost any other time.
I sat on a rocky beach one afternoon, tears streaming down my face saying to God, "It's so great here.... I love it so much." and clear as day, God responded "It will be better there."
Weeks later, still making lists and weighing my options, I cried out, "I just can't decide." to which God quickly responded, "I have already made the decision."
And so, those two clear moments have carried me and focused my thoughts and actions over the past months of preparation.
Sitting at a concert one night, we heard a song talking all about "home" and we just looked at each other and smiled, excited to be returning home again.
All of the times we missed our friends and family in PA over the last few years, we would always come back to the fact that Paul wasn't ready to leave Amazon. So, when this option presented itself, it was a bridge between the sadness of missing our "people" and the opportunity to keep a great job.
Dozens of journal entries log my emotional highs and lows of trying to listen for God's voice in the middle of the questions.
Because the kids struggled so much moving West, our first duty was to let them decide. Maeve quickly agreed to move and delighted about seeing her family much more often. She started counting the days she could spend with her grandparents and delighted in more celebrations at "home." Noah immediately said "no." and so we left it at that.
As weeks went by, we didn't bring up the topic, but one day, while sitting in the back seat, Noah said flatly, "I'm ready to move back." Of course, we talked it all through and he agreed that he was on board. He was excited about the idea of having a yard and a house with more space and seeing all of the people he has been missing so much.
God's voice has been more clear to me in the past few months than almost any other time.
I sat on a rocky beach one afternoon, tears streaming down my face saying to God, "It's so great here.... I love it so much." and clear as day, God responded "It will be better there."
Weeks later, still making lists and weighing my options, I cried out, "I just can't decide." to which God quickly responded, "I have already made the decision."
And so, those two clear moments have carried me and focused my thoughts and actions over the past months of preparation.
Sitting at a concert one night, we heard a song talking all about "home" and we just looked at each other and smiled, excited to be returning home again.
School
It was part of the plan to keep the kids out of school until we find a house and move in. We get corporate housing for two months in Manhattan and we felt that it would be educational to explore this great city and all of the culture, art and museums. When else do you get to live in Manhattan for two months, rent free?!
The kids are convinced they are being "home schooled" which is a pretty funny idea. I have been making them do work and they have to read and write every day.
A few days ago I had them watch the Gorsuch Supreme Court Justice Confirmation hearings and we explored the three branches of government, learned about the balance of power, veto and a very basic outline of how a law is made. We had a really great time exploring all of the topics and they are just eager little sponges.
Today we picked up some small sketch books and they decorated the covers. Inside they have written about what they have done each day, adding pictures, thoughts and feelings to this whole process.
I'm not sure if I'm home school mom material, but for a short time, it's really fun!
Friday, January 27, 2017
All Clear
My two year appointment went well. The MRI was shorter which I attribute to the doctor requesting less of an in depth look (and to save my body from the extra radiation). The doctor looked through everything and said it was fine. It never looks fine to me as there are large white blob like sections on the scans but he assured me that it is scar tissue. I asked how they know the difference between scar tissue and tumor and he said they don't. Great. In any case, they look for other factors like a change in shape of the tissue, the folds of the brain showing pressure, or changes in my vision, balance and abilities. My white blood cells still aren't completely up to snuff, but as he said -- they have been much much worse. They decided to move my appointments out to three months instead of two. All of these signs are very encouraging and are the exact words you would want to hear.
Despite all of this, I never seem to leave the appointments feeling a sense of relief. I always harbor this small voice that thinks that they missed something or that I saw something on the scan that they didn't (as if I have a clue what I am looking at!). I wonder if anyone who has been through a cancer diagnosis every really feels a complete sense of freedom or a complete release of fear.
Once I am back in reality, away from the hospital, I do forget again that I've been through all of this and I don't replay those days of surgery, recovery and treatment over in my head. I live separately from that experience.
Though I never bump into walls anymore and the left handed vision episodes are very sporadic, one of the pieces that still lingers in my life is the ability to piece together mental puzzles. I'm not sure how to explain it fully, but I can't organize my thoughts the way I used to be able to do. I have to physically draw out how things relate to each other sometimes and I have to review schedules and lists and plans over and over and over again and sometimes even then I can't see the sequences or order of how it should all play out. The amount of variables I used to be able to carry and organize is much smaller.
The second noticeable difference that I feel is from the medicine that I am on. The medicine dulls areas in my brain in order to prevent seizure activity. Through research and talking to a friend of mine who is a doctor, I have been able to explain that I don't have the same enthusiasm or mental energy that I used to have. I'm sure this also comes with being a little older, but I don't feel as though I have the same mental way of looking at things. Life feels almost muted and it seems logical to me that it is from the medicine. I can look into other medicines and I might do that.
So, all in all, it was a perfect report. I am grateful.
Despite all of this, I never seem to leave the appointments feeling a sense of relief. I always harbor this small voice that thinks that they missed something or that I saw something on the scan that they didn't (as if I have a clue what I am looking at!). I wonder if anyone who has been through a cancer diagnosis every really feels a complete sense of freedom or a complete release of fear.
Once I am back in reality, away from the hospital, I do forget again that I've been through all of this and I don't replay those days of surgery, recovery and treatment over in my head. I live separately from that experience.
Though I never bump into walls anymore and the left handed vision episodes are very sporadic, one of the pieces that still lingers in my life is the ability to piece together mental puzzles. I'm not sure how to explain it fully, but I can't organize my thoughts the way I used to be able to do. I have to physically draw out how things relate to each other sometimes and I have to review schedules and lists and plans over and over and over again and sometimes even then I can't see the sequences or order of how it should all play out. The amount of variables I used to be able to carry and organize is much smaller.
The second noticeable difference that I feel is from the medicine that I am on. The medicine dulls areas in my brain in order to prevent seizure activity. Through research and talking to a friend of mine who is a doctor, I have been able to explain that I don't have the same enthusiasm or mental energy that I used to have. I'm sure this also comes with being a little older, but I don't feel as though I have the same mental way of looking at things. Life feels almost muted and it seems logical to me that it is from the medicine. I can look into other medicines and I might do that.
So, all in all, it was a perfect report. I am grateful.
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