Noah has been thoroughly enjoying his rock climbing team since he started in September. He has had a few competitions but we kept it very lighthearted and didn't even tell him his scores or rank. He didn't ask and didn't seem interested so we figured that we would keep it fun for him. There is plenty of time later in life for ranking and competition.
After two competitions, he had a good handle on the process. Mid season, the kids have a regional competition to decide who moves on. The competition is very serious. The kids arrive two hours early and are sent to a holding room. They have timed beginnings and can not see anything in the gym until their time. When they come out of the room they can only look forward at the crowd and not back at the walls. They have 4 minutes to climb the wall, having never seen it before. They are given points based on whether they slip, touch an improper hold, whether they get to the top and how far they make it. When the timer goes off everyone has to get off. The kids move to the next wall with their backs turned. Noah did well on the first two walls. On the third wall (out of 6), Noah struggled and got very frustrated. He immediately wanted to leave the competition and give up. It was so heart wrenching for me and I felt like I was going to throw up from my nervousness, I wanted him to succeed and feel proud.
He moved on to the fourth wall which was even harder. He just kept falling out of anger and frustration. We weren't allowed to talk to him at all.
As he moved on to number five we all watched with surprise. This wall was almost completely horizontal and on a reverse incline with very few holds. All the kids were falling off but Noah couldn't see them because he couldn't look at the wall. He was just assuming he was the only one struggling.
One of his good friends was cheering him on so fiercely and she started to tear up when she saw his frustration. She wanted to go and boost his spirits.
As the competition ended we were really worried about him and then his coaches and friends rallied around him. Finally he could see the other climbers falling.
The girls climbed next and he could cheer them on. He was so passionate and encouraging.
Rock pclimbing is mostly a solitary sport, but it was so clear that training together 3-4 days a week bonded the kids. This made me so happy.
When we left we all went for ice cream and told him how proud we were that he didn't give up.
I know it won't be the first time but it was so painful not to be able to help him. I know he had the strength and the ability to climb the walls but mentally he wasn't prepared to fail.
We've been talking a lot about our inner voice and how sometimes we let the voice of defeat speak louder than other voices. Later that evening he came to me and said he realized he wasn't listening to the "can" voice.
We talked a lot about digging deep when it feels like there is nothing left and we smiled and laughed about the day.
I'm sure some day my kids will tell me to stop talking them to death, but for now they seem to enjoy our times of introspection.
I'm sure we have many more competitions, more success and more failures ahead and I'm grateful for this stepping stone for Noah.
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